Rick Rowell / ABC
Scenes From The Bachelor Spinoff Ben And Lauren: Happily Ever After: Predicted!
One of the dullest couples in Bachelor Nation gets a spinoff about their beautiful love affair. We think we know how it will go.
Episode 1
I can't believe we get to start our lives together.
All the stress we went through on our journey to each other was worth it, because now I know what my future is, and it's you.
I know I told both you and JoJo that I loved you, but I know for sure that you're the one I love more.
...Okay. Great.
...
Why would you bring her up?
I don't know, I'm sorry.
You know she's got her own season now, right? Maybe you want to go on it.
I don't, I want to be with you.
...
Today I'm excited that we get to go shop for our new place at Raymour & Flanigan!
Yes, I know that's a store where...we'll be able to find furniture that...marries my traditional style.
[under his breath] "and"?
My traditional style and Ben's more modern tastes.
Right. Let's go!
Episode 3
It's the 4th of July, and today I'm excited to host Ben and I's families at our first cookout!
I grew up watching my dad grill out, so I hope I can make him proud and he doesn't have too many notes on my technique!
As long as you got my dad's Miller Lite, he'll be happy!
Bud Light. I sure did!
Oh, no. Really?
[through gritted teeth] Yep! And maybe some of our friends from Bachelor Nation will stop by!
[quietly] Should I call and tell him to bring his own?
[even more quietly] If he wants to sit in the car and drink it.
[muttering] Maybe I'll join him.
You got Andi's veggie burgers, right?
[glares]
That was for later, wasn't it.
AND IT WOULDN'T BE A PARTY WITHOUT SOLO CUPS.
You said it!
Episode 6
We've been putting it off, but today we're meeting with a State Farm representative Nick Viall actually recommended and getting serious about our future.
You can't start planning for a family and everything that comes with it unless you feel secure that your life and possessions are protected, and I know we'll have that peace of mind thanks to State Farm.
Especially the way this one drives!
Sorry, which one of us went up on a curb because he was texting JoJo?
It was an emergency!
What emergency could she POSSIBLY need you to deal with?
Uh--
Bikini selection?
She had four and she was late to set.
How much did we say we wanted to take out for your life insurance?
A million.
Let's double that.
Episode 8
I'm a very creative, artistic person, and today we're having Chris Harrison over to talk about ways to bring creativity into a relationship.
Yes, Chris is a bestselling novelist, so we're lucky to get to talk about this with him.
"Lucky" seems like a stretch considering he's just going to tell us to go to Color Me Mine or something.
Well, what would you like to do?
I would like to get that "Mrs. Higgins" jersey back from JoJo.
But she loves sleeping in it because it's so soft.
Episode 13
I can't believe the day is nearly here, but it is: tomorrow is Ben & I's wedding.
All our family and friends and so many of the Bachelor Nation pals who've been part of our journey are going to be there, and I can't wait to share our special day with all of them.
I just ask one thing, which is that you keep her away from me.
She's engaged to someone else.
HA HA HA.
What?
Oh nothing, I just forgot no one who got engaged on this show ever breaks up later.
Why can't you be happy for her?
AND NEIL LANE DESIGNED SPECIAL WEDDING BANDS FOR US.
I can't wait to put on the one piece of clothing I'll never take off.
...
[under his breath] "And I couldn't--"
And I couldn't agree more. Unless someone from Disney told me to, and then I guess I'd have to.