Screen: Fox
Let's call this the Brooklyn Nine-Nine that just keeps giving...directly to the Ariano/Cole household.
First, there was the plotline revolving around a possible move to Canada -- a story that's obviously pitched right to these two snobby Canadian expatriates, which I enjoyed even though ever since I Googled Beaver Tails, I've been cursing my current distance from the Rideau Canal, I MEAN HONESTLY. But then...oh, but then.
So we start the episode by getting a look at the incredibly strict diet that Terry, Amy, and Gina are all doing together. Park Slope Portions couldn't be easier! Meals are delivered straight to your door, and what breakfast could be more satisfying than an orange slice, three cashews, and a single grape? (Not a Beaver Tail, that's for sure.) And though, as we can tell from his physique, Terry is not short on resolve, his diet partners don't have his staying power. First Gina cracks and goes to town on a "Sloppy Jessica": "mac and cheese chili pizza on a bun." Amy hangs in a little longer, but then Hitchcock bumps into her and makes her spit out the almond she's been sucking on for hours before stepping on it, whereupon she loses her damn mind all over him and the whole squad room, and why wouldn't she? Leaching all the flavour from a nut and then not even getting the pleasure of swallowing it? Hitchcock's lucky she didn't murder him.
Terry stays vigilant against cravings, hoping the sight and smell of croissants will be enough to fill his spirit if not his stomach. But even though his mind may still be strong, his GI tract is another story.
And that's the moment when we had to stop our recording so that my esteemed colleague David T. Cole could spend two full minutes giggling like an anime schoolgirl. Enjoy your day.