Which Degrassi Pairings Are Potentially Still On The Table?

Because no show on TV loves its fans more unconditionally than TeenNick loves fans of Degrassi, the show's official blog put together this masterpiece just in time for Valentine's Day: "a comprehensive relationship flowchart" for the series to date. It is pretty remarkable.

I had hardly clapped eyes on this thing before I started matching up characters who hadn't already hooked up in some way. Even though the show refreshes its cast more than most — more even than other shows set in high schools — eventually everyone's going to get with everyone else, regardless of which past partners they might have in common (which, as the chart visually proves, is everybody they know). So here are the couples who still have yet to kiss on each other, and how it'll probably go down.*

Connor & Clare

Portmanteau: Clarenor.

Could get together if: Jenna decides to go live with her brother in Alberta after all, and/or if she decides she no longer feels like being, in the words of Monica Geller, Connor's "relationship tutor."

Would break up when: Connor fails to pick up on cues that Clare might not be interested in hearing a rational breakdown of why she is deluding herself believing in God.

Drew & Jenna

Portmanteau: Drenna.

Could get together if: Drew cynically decides that his burgeoning political career requires that he line up a camera-ready blonde helpmeet à la Cindy McCain or Callista Gingrich.

Would break up when: Jenna demands to perform one of her original songs at a fundraiser.

Imogen & Becky

Portmanteau: Beckogen.

Could get together if: They come to the realization that they are the only people who can truly understand what it was like to lose Adam.

Would break up when: Becky insists upon remaining abstinent, when Imogen has known — and enjoyed — the joys of the flesh with Fiona.

Zig & Alli

Portmanteau: Zilli.

Could get together if: She decides that, after her ordeal with Leo, she's better off with a younger dude who will let her control him instead of the other way around.

Would break up when: He gets too embarrassed about not being able to afford to take her on nice dates because his family is [whisper] poor.

Drew & Mike & Maya

Portmanteau: Drika.

Could get together if: Maya's new rebellious phase leads her to learn about polyamory, and Mike decides he might as well be a little flexible in his sexual orientation if a third of his throuple lives right there under the same roof.

Would break up when: The show needs to teach kids to be careful about being part of a polyamorous throuple in the age of social media when you think you might want to be a politician or a professional hockey player or a classical musician someday.

* tee hee!