Canadian Hoarding: Exposed!

Last night's episode of Hoarding: Buried Alive departed from its usual environs to visit "western Canada" and introduce us to Kelly Jay, who, guess what, is a hoarder. Of course, it's possible that this wasn't actually your first introduction to Jay, since he was once a figure of some fame as a member of Crowbar, a Canadian band that, according to its members, rubbed elbows with such '60s and '70s rock gods as Mick Jagger and Paul McCartney. But like a good, unassuming Canadian, Jay hasn't tried to extend his fame by appearing on The Celebrity Apprentice or writing a bad rock opera based on his music; instead, he's getting on TV, very apologetically, by confessing his hoarding problem to the world.

For the Canadian viewer, the component elements of Jay's hoarding was...kind of sweet. Naturally, some of it was standard for the show -- the stove didn't work, the floors were caked with dust, and when one of his old Crowbar buddies went into the fridge to get -- what else? -- a beer, he found that the bottom of the fridge was invisible under a puddle of viscous brown goo. But then there were posters and photos of the maple leaf-festooned Crowbar logo, the "Blue Bird Canada" school bus in the backyard (filled, Jay thinks, with Crowbar memorabilia), and the dozen empty Chapman's ice cream pails lining the kitchen wall. And while most American hoarders profiled on the show sleep in literal piles of trash with maybe a filthy pillow for comfort, Jay not only still sleeps in the bedroom his late wife Tammy Jean died in, but before the camera crew arrived, he made the bed.

Much of the episode revolved around Jay coming to terms with the idea that he had to clean up the house because the clutter blocking paths to egress may have hindered EMS from reaching Tammy Jean and possibly saving her life, and that it therefore posed a very real danger to Jay himself, too. For that reason, the time spent documenting the actual cleanup was limited, and we didn't get to see how much Canadian Tire money Jay had squirrelled away in various hiding places around the house. But I bet he had a lot.