Suspect Confronts Alex And Brian About Their Secrets

Alex thinks Josh, who's already come out to her as gay, is hiding from her the fact that he's trans, on the basis that he goes often to a local bar that has drag shows, and that he once let a friend do his makeup and texted her a photo. ...Sure? This storyline might have been more compelling or shocking if that hadn't already been the very first secret of the very first episode. As it is: eh.

Alex and Josh are close friends; he came out to her before he came out to his family. I might personally feel that she should back off and let him tell her if he wants to transition rather than involve Nev Schulman and some TV cameras, but it does seem like she's coming to this matter from a place of love.

Ridiculous. Alex brings Nev and iO to this bar, where they have a completely spontaneous conversation with several drag performers about how they think Alex should approach Josh about his possible transition. They seem to agree that Josh might have been dropping hints about his intentions to gauge her reactions, but none of them says she should just butt out and let him come to her when he's ready. They then go talk to Josh's friend Luna, who's known him long enough to remember when he used to be much heavier; she's concerned that he's lost weight in an unhealthy way.

I think maybe you should have started there? Because this isn't a show?

Straight up, I in no way predicted that Josh was going to say his deal is that he eats cotton balls. Holy shit! Scream Queens is real!

And by that, of course, I mean...uh, that's awful, get help, Josh.

Taking Josh to one therapy session is pretty much the bare minimum MTV can do after making him confess to this very weird practice on TV.

Josh has gone to see a doctor "intermittently." That doesn't seem like enough? But he and Alex are still friends, which is good, because he needs one.

Roshan thinks Brian is a stripper. In a post-Magic Mike world, this is just not scandalous.

Brian is a professional dancer who just booked his first national commercial, and Roshan is both his friend and his manager, so if he's potentially damaging his brand by flapping his dong around when he's not promoting Sprite or whatever the hell, that's bad for his career and, by extension, hers.

Part of the reason Roshan thinks Brian might be a stripper is that they had a weird interaction in a part of town where there are a lot of strip clubs, so they basically just GO TO THAT STREET CORNER and Google Map the kinds of businesses that are around. They "happen" to find a listing for something called the Den of Iniquity, which turns out to be a dominatrix dungeon. They quickly determine that only women work there (so that rules this out as Brian's sideline), and don't even bother asking Cybill, the dominatrix on duty, if Brian is a client, since she'd already said she wasn't going to tell them anything about what goes on there or who may be involved. So then iO just tells her to start messing around with Nev. I guess it's supposed to be funny?

Nev and iO then arrange a Skype call with Shayana, Brian's girlfriend, who lives in Seattle. They give her the broad strokes of what they're doing...

...and then Shayana stands up and shows them that she's quite pregnant with Brian's son. iO and Nev are surprised and happily thrilled, and after some brief conversation behind Truth Seeker Roshan's back -- it sounds like when she and Shayana met, they hated each other -- iO has a question.

I think the more you ask this, the more you're going to end up asking yourself what the fuck you're doing here. But whatever: they do call Brian and tell him they know he's having a baby, and that Roshan enlisted them to find out what, if any, secret he was keeping from her. He says that if they're going to bring Roshan, he wants to talk to them first, because he's nervous, and they're like "Totally!" and then the next thing we see is them going to pick up Roshan to bring her to where Brian's rehearsing, so either there was a conversation among iO, Nev, and Brian that got cut or else they're completely disregarding his wishes.

Whichever it is, Roshan ends up at Brian's rehearsal space, where he tells her Shayana's pregnant. Roshan doesn't handle it well. At first, she acts like he's joking. Then, she doesn't congratulate him. Then, he asks if Shayana's moving to Los Angeles, and when he says he's going to move to Seattle, she replies, "What about your career?" So she's really more of a manager than a friend, I guess. "I think I'm gonna have to put it on hold," he says. She immediately starts trying to talk him out of taking parental leave and urging him to make Shayana move to Los Angeles: "If she really loves you, she wouldn't ask you to put your career on hold." So many assumptions in that sentence! Who says she did ask him? Who says he's not going to become a full-time parent? How about "CONGRATULATIONS," which you still haven't fucking said? I basically hold a Viking funeral whenever one of my friends tells me they're having kids and I can fake it WAY better than this broad. Brian stands firm...and then fires Roshan. Well, she brought that on herself. Maybe this is not how the conversation had to end if you had just been a little less shitty, Roshan! But hey: at least he's not stripping!

Brian's fine, so: not applicable.

Gonna go ahead and say Brian's almost certainly better off without Roshan on his team in a professional capacity! But apparently he's still dancing and pursuing modeling, and still friends with Roshan. But the baby's not born yet, so after that, who knows?