Secret Shoe Shopping, Four-Figure Surprises, And Beauty Budgeting: Who's Learning What On Teenage Newlyweds?

All couples have a lot to learn from the experience of marriage, but when you get married when the ink is barely dry on your high school diploma, the learning seems to be non-stop. Let's take a look at each of our couples and consider who learned what this week.

Brenda & Travis

Surely no one thought last week that Brenda might actually be pregnant, and sure enough, she isn't. Based on her manner afterward, I thought we were going to find out she'd faked the results or something...

...but I guess Brenda just looks bedraggled and shifty-eyed by default, even when she's not hiding anything.

With that out of the way, they can get down to the business of organizing their household finances, which is going to be a challenge given that Brenda is only making about $50 a week and Travis is making $0. (I assume that since it's student housing, it's covered by student loans they'll pay off later?) We've been hearing since the series premiere that the differences in Travis and Brenda's backgrounds (his parents are middle-class, while her mother is working-class), and here's where we actually see that in action, as Brenda tries to explain to Travis that the consequence of their tiny income is that they won't have a lot of money to spend on anything but pure necessities, and Travis's response is that they just do whatever this month and start living within their means next month. And just because Brenda's not on board with this scheme, that doesn't mean Travis doesn't feel free to go out with a couple of his fellow scrubs and buy a new skate shoes -- something he says he "really need"s.

When he gets home with them, Brenda can't help noticing the box, and is shocked that he spent $65 on them, particularly since, as she says, he already had two pairs. He counters by saying she has expensive boots, to which she replies that she has one pair of boots, which were a gift from him. Speaking of gifts? Travis happens to have spent this lavishly on himself the weekend of Brenda's birthday. Advantage: Brenda.

Off they go from this unresolved discussion to buy refreshments for her birthday party (which, btw, you're all poor students: make it a pot luck in lieu of gifts). Travis's "we'll budget tomorrow" strategy is working great for him until they've checked out their cart and come up $5 short -- which, by the way, Travis tells the cashier in a tone that makes it sound like he thinks it might be her fault. We leave it here for now, but we may reasonably assume Travis has learned a valuable lesson.

Halie & George

Neither Halie nor George has any idea how money works, apparently; even though Halie is the daughter of a professional financial planner, all she has to her name is a savings account containing what one assumes is the original $25 with which it was started. (So it's probably at least earned a little interest since her grandma gave her that money or whatever, but apparently her dad never tried to teach her about that.) Also still happening this week: Halie is desperately lonely for her family -- but George doesn't want her to try assuaging that loneliness by going to see them, since he wants her to let him meet ALL her emotional needs, I guess? (We also learn in this episode that they considered staying in Mesa, but that George ruled it out because, per Halie, "he didn't want me to rely on my family more than I relied on him." Cool?)

So, I guess, to prove that he is up for the job of curing Halie's depression, George comes out in a gigantic Hawaiian shirt to tell her they're going to Hawaii! Halie is faintly impressed by the gesture, but tells him he needs to cash in the tickets. And she's right, obviously: this is a bad way to break in a brand-new credit card -- particularly for someone who already said, earlier in this very episode, that he doesn't really understand how credit cards work -- to say nothing of the extra fees he'd have to pay to rent a car, given that he has yet to turn twenty-five, and I wouldn't trust this boner to book a doghouse, never mind a hotel room. Also Halie JUST started a job, which may not want to give her time off immediately?

Emma & Joey

Joey and Emma apparently got over their concerns about their mortgage broker, because they're starting to look at houses. And just look how ready Joey is for a conversation about expenses they'll need to cut in order to build up their savings!

Emma admits that there are areas where she spends, like shopping, and Joey pipes up to say she spends money on her hair. Emma isn't ready to cut that expense, though: "Getting my hair done, I think, actually, okay for me to do, because it's time that I get to myself, and it's something that makes me feel better." I would respectfully submit that whatever Emma's paying to get her hair done is not actually enough? Because she's rocking this pee rinse in all her interviews.