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The Knick

Is An Unwanted Pregnancy Worse Than A Kidney Cyst?

We're counting down the physical ailments of the latest The Knick from least to most terrible! (And in answer to the question posed by the headline: yes.)

Tara Ariano
 

Every episode of The Knick is, of course, chockablock with patients who are in the middle of learning all the ways our too too solid flesh can get real fucked up, particularly in a time when all cops were on the take, almost all problems were solved with violence, and the general view was that basic hygiene was for sissies. Maybe it just seems like this week is gnarlier than most because it's...the latest one? But let's order the week's ailments, counting down from the least catastrophic to the absolute worst...until whatever happens next week.

  1. 2014-09-12-the-knick3

    Busted Face
    It's bad enough that the dodgy (literal) sawbones at the top of the episode thinks it's what Bunky's brought his unfortunate brother-in-law in to have treated, but not bad enough for us even to get a good look at it or for it to be mentioned after the first dude comments on it. The shitty first doctor recommends "bed rest and cold compresses." I'd take a dose of that right now and I'm not even injured (just lazy).

  2. 2014-09-12-the-knick4

    Kidney Cyst
    Evidently it's quite painful, if it's easy for Algernon to suspect his mother's distress may be appendicitis. But Thack -- already on the scene after a call from Captain Robertson -- can tell it's just a cyst, and though the process of his popping it doesn't seem like a fun way to spend the middle of the night, it does the trick and she immediately runs off to pee. I'd call that outcome an unqualified success!

  3. 2014-09-12-the-knick5

    Hernia
    Pretty gross. Requires secret surgery in a barely lit room that might get invaded at any moment by two idiots looking for a private place to have sex. Will involve the use of an experimental silver thread for sutures that might fail and leave the patient alive but in terrible pain. Still...it won't kill him? So there's that?

  4. 2014-09-12-the-knick6

    Unwanted Pregnancy
    Pregnancy is a blessed event if the child is wanted. And pregnancy is not a total crisis if the neighbourhood sketchball can connect you with a midwife-abortionist. But pregnancy is a life-ruiner if (a) you don't want to be a mother and (b) wait to seek help terminating until you're seven months along, cc everyone from the Teen Mom franchise.

  5. 2014-09-12-the-knick7

    Meningitis
    Very painful, particularly for an infant who can't understand what's happening to her. Potentially fatal for any child under five. Could cause lingering after-effects, any one of which is pretty bad -- and that list I linked to is from our current era, so christ knows how much worse it might have been over a century ago. And, as if all that wasn't bad enough, the treatment involves this crazy-looking head contraption.

  6. 2014-09-12-the-knick8

    Busted Leg
    A compound fracture of the leg that involves a major artery is not desirable for anyone, and could quite easily require amputation of the limb. But here's something that makes it worse: when the patient's brother-in-law is a criminal who threatens to murder a hospital administrator and both attending surgeons if the leg can't be saved! But no pressure.

  7. 2014-09-12-the-knick-9

    Placenta Previa
    The surest way to die at The Knick is to develop placenta previa. Good luck, ladies.

  8. 2014-09-12-the-knick10

    Syphilis Nose
    I know this didn't happen in the latest episode and I don't care. It's so horrible that I'm still not over it and I ACTUALLY KIND OF THINK THE CURE IS WORSE THAN THE DISEASE.

Tara Ariano