The Mindy Project Faces Friends In The Battle Of The Professionally Threatened Sitcom Moms

Which gives its mom the more odious antagonist?

WELL, THIS ONE'S EASY. On The Mindy Project, Mindy's in the middle of complaining to Morgan about the guy who gave her guff for nursing Leo on the subway when she hears his voice outside: uh oh, that very same guy is Jody Kimball-Kinney (Garret Dillahunt!), the practice's new OB/GYN! Somehow, Shulman & Associates has found the only OB/GYN alive who isn't militantly pro-breastfeeding! He later cheerfully admits that Mindy's right to call him sexist: he claims women should be thrilled to agree that there are fundamental differences between the sexes because men are so disgusting. Because it's Dillahunt, it's almost charming, but if I were a southern OB/GYN who doesn't hold backwards beliefs about women and childbirth, I would be pretty offended that all of Jody's wrong-headed opinions are being attributed to the fact that he's from Georgia.

Over on Friends, Gavin Mitchell (Dermot Mulroney!) -- who's been transferred from another department to cover Rachel's duties while she's been on maternity leave -- just reads like a typically ignorant single straight guy. His worst crime, as far as Rachel's concerned, seems to be possibly trying to usurp her. And, okay, it's also not great when he refers to her mat leave as her "baby vacation," but it does set up this exchange:

Rachel: My idea of a vacation does not involve something sucking on my nipples until they are raw.

Gavin: Clearly, you've never been to Sandals Paradise Island.

Best dialogue of the episode? A case could be made.

Winner: The Mindy Project.

Which show's mom has the more responsible approach to ending her maternity leave?

Definitely Mindy. Despite Danny's somewhat nonsensical belief that he'll be able to convince her to give up her job(s) and stay at home with Leo full-time, Mindy's maternity leave is ending in a week as the episode starts, and her return to the office is only to try to sabotage Jody. Rachel, on the other hand, meets Gavin and then cuts her leave by two weeks because she's so threatened by him. What kind of idiot gives up two weeks of baby vacation -- while she's still breastfeeding, and without having hired a nanny? (Which by the way she and Ross maybe should have done sooner than two weeks before Rachel's supposed to go back to work, but anyway.)

Winner: The Mindy Project.

Which show's mom has a less irresponsible plan for trying to best her foe?

Since she and Ross have had no time to make arrangements for Emma's care, Rachel has to bring Emma to the office with her when she impetuously decides to return, which is disruptive to her colleagues and probably not a ton of fun for Emma, but at least isn't going to ruin anyone's life.

Rachel just tries to show Gavin up with her superior professionalism; Mindy sets out to try to find evidence of wrongdoing that will get Jody fired. Soon, she's snooping around after Jody -- both in his office, and with his patients (one of whom tells Mindy that Jody told her husband to stay out of the delivery room so that her vagina could "remain a beautiful mystery" to him, IN 2015). This is both disruptive to everyone else at the practice and could ruin Jody's life. I mean, I don't want a doctor who thinks women should hide out from their husbands during labour, but Jody's patient is happy with her care, so obviously, in this case, like called to like and two idiots found each other. Mind your own business, Mindy.

Winner: Friends.

Which show's feud is resolved in a more satisfactory manner?

This one has to go to Friends by default, since The Mindy Project leaves the matter open: Mindy threatens to quit the practice because she hates Jody so much, and while Jody's nurse/sister Collette urges Mindy to stay (causing Mindy to mistake her friendly overtures for a come-on, which Collette makes clear they are not), Danny is excited that Mindy changed her mind about working and decided to see things his way, and she...lets him. BOOOOOO.

On Friends, Rachel crams for the presentation Gavin was going to do in his role as temporary Rachel, and seems prepared; when it gets moved up several hours and she won't be able to get Ross to the office in time to relieve her of Emma, Gavin graciously lets her take the presentation, offering to look after Emma in Rachel's absence. Rachel is appropriately grateful. (And then, a couple of episodes later, even more appropriately grateful when he shows up for her birthday party and they end up making out on Monica's terrace -- in full view of Ross.) For now: Rachel manages to be a decent person as well as a professional, and Gavin may learn something about babies, like that when you meet them, they generally don't shake hands.

Winner: Friends.

Which has more entertaining subplots?

The Mindy Project really just has one: Danny wants to get Mindy a push present, but all his gift ideas are terrible -- the cranberry merino turtleneck some website list advised as a great gift "for mom" ends up regifted to Morgan as "a prank"/"trash" -- so he ends up getting Leo's name tattooed over his heart. At least Friends has both Chandler pursuing an unpaid internship at an ad agency while trying to get Monica pregnant (with several sexually aggressive greetings from Monica, delivered before she notices Ross is present, hee hee); and Joey getting Phoebe a generally disastrous gig as an extra on Days Of Our Lives (where we get to see several of the many extras Joey is constantly sleeping with).

Winner: Friends.

Verdict

The Mindy Project may swing for the fences with a worse villain in Jody, but all the business surrounding his introduction stretches believability. Friends, once again you reign supreme.

Winner: Friends.