Looking Ahead To The Two And A Half Men Cast Lineups Of The Future
In the long, long-ago, some of us whose job it was to monitor behind-the-scenes TV industry drama thought that the fast-motion train wreck Charlie Sheen was making of his life generally, and the trestle bridge to his producer Chuck Lorre that he'd pretty decisively blown to cinders in particular, might spell the end of Two And A Half Men -- you know, since Sheen was one of the titular Men and clearly wasn't going to be able to work with Lorre anymore. (Evidently, being rude to one's colleagues is unforgivable but getting arrested multiple times for physically abusing your wife: eh.) However, we underestimated the interest CBS would have in keeping its ratings juggernaut on the air, so: enter Walden (Ashton Kutcher), an internet billionaire who buys Sheen's character Charlie's house after Charlie's death, and then lets Charlie's brother Alan (Jon Cryer) and Alan's son Jake (Angus T. Jones) continue living there because ??????. And now, with Jones being rolled back from series regular in the show's coming eleventh season, the news is that Jake will be replaced by a new character: the daughter Charlie never knew he had, who will almost certainly also end up living with Walden and Alan because ??????. And though it may seem like turning the show into two men and a woman changes Two And A Half Men in a pretty essential way, producers have plans for the years ahead that can keep the franchise alive basically forever.
Season 1: Charlie Harper, Charlie's brother Alan, and Alan's son Jake
Season 2: Charlie, Alan, and Jake
Season 3: Charlie, Alan, and Jake
Season 4: Charlie, Alan, and Jake
Season 5: Charlie, Alan, and Jake
Season 6: Charlie, Alan, and Jake
Season 7: Charlie, Alan, and Jake
Season 8: Charlie, Alan, and Jake
Season 9: Alan, Jake, and Walden (Ashton Kutcher), a failed suicide who essentially washes up on Alan's doorstep after Charlie's death
Season 10: Alan, Jake, and Walden
Season 11: Alan, Walden, and Cheryl (Danielle Panabaker), Charlie's long-lost daughter
Season 12: Alan, Cheryl, and Ward (T.J. Miller), Walden's brother, who inherits Walden's fortune after Walden does end up killing himself
Season 13: Alan, Ward, and Marguerite (Daveigh Chase), Cheryl's sorority sister turned stripper
Season 14: Alan, Marguerite, and Jake, who returns to live with Alan after suffering total amnesia and being returned to his last known address by his commanding officer
Season 15: Alan, Jake, Marguerite (now Jake's wife), and Stevie (Drake Bell), an old army buddy Jake did gay stuff with when they were enlisted
Season 16: Alan, Jake, Stevie, and Stevie's identical twin brother Reg (also Bell)
Season 17: Alan, Reg, and Walden's ghost
Season 18: Walden's ghost, Charlie's ghost, and the house's new owner, Biff (Ted McGinley)