Has Trouble Taken Up Permanent Residence At The Bates Motel?

Secret Secrets Hurt Someone

Alert Type: Shame Alert.

Issue: Anna is still refusing to tell Bates why she's suddenly acting like she can't stand the sight of him.

Complicating Factors: When Mrs. Hughes takes Anna aside to tell her to quit being so weird all the time (particularly now that they know for sure that Anna's assault didn't result in a pregnancy), Bates totally eavesdrops on the whole conversation!

Resolution: Bates corners Mrs. Hughes and makes her tell him what happened by saying that if she doesn't, he's going to quit, and leave the house before Anna returns from an errand in town. He (correctly) assumes that Green is the culprit, which Mrs. Hughes denies, claiming that it was just some random crook who had broken into the house during the concert. Bates pushes Mrs. Hughes to swear on her dead mother's grave that it was not Green, and though Mrs. Hughes is clearly nervous about it, she does. Bates then goes to Anna to tell her he knows what happened and that she's not spoiled for him — in fact, she's "holier" for her ordeal (which: gross?).

Spoiler: Even though Bates made Anna think the chapter is closed, he tells Mrs. Hughes that "nothing is over and done with," and that he still intends to find out who raped Anna and totally kill him!

Covert Affairs

The maid Thomas recommended has arrived! And she seems nice! Which is weird!

Putting A Square Pegg In A Round Hole He Dug In The Dowager Countess's Garden

Alert Type: Project Alert.

Issue: Dr. Clarkson has heard about a kid named Pegg who needs a gardener job, and Isobel thinks he might be a great addition to the staff at the Crawley dower house!

Complicating Factors: The Dowager C is automatically suspicious of any recommendation that comes to her via Isobel, so when some fancy paper knife that belonged to the late Lord G goes missing after Pegg was in her drawing room watering plants, she assumes he took it.

Resolution: Dr. Clarkson suggests that someone could shadow Pegg whenever he comes in the house on his legitimate gardener business.

Spoiler: Things don't look great for Pegg's long-term employment chez Dowager C.

Singer!

Manual stitching is so hard on the neck and the eyes, there must have been times when you've thought, "There's got to be a better way!" Now there is: the Singer electric sewing machine! Race through your seams with the greatest of ease! Impress people you're trying to win over by mending their aprons so expertly that they can't even tell where they were damaged!

Please note: system requirements include an electric socket. If you don't have one in your room, you can ask to set up in the servants' hall. Prepare for snotty remarks (at first) and fears about you sewing your fingers together.

Lord G Is The (Changing) World's Softest Touch

You can tell that Mary and Tom's cold-eyed, pragmatic take on estate management is starting to rub off a little on Lord G because about the third thing he says to a young Drewe, whose tenant-farmer dad just died AND WHOSE FUNERAL THEY ARE WALKING AWAY FROM, is that Drewe shouldn't worry about clearing out in a giant hurry. It seems that old Drewe was a few months behind in the rent, so Lord G assumes that's it for the Drewes, but young Drewe says he'd actually like to take over the tenancy even though notices have been served and the case is closed. Drewe clearly knows whom he's talking to, because as soon as he mentions that the Drewes have been running the farm "since the Napoleonic Wars." That's the whistle only Lord G can hear, of course, and before you know it, he's secretly lending Drewe the difference between what he has and what he owes...and since it never occurs to Drewe that Lord G wouldn't share that info with Tom and Mary, he totally lets the cat out of the moneybag, and they decide that they're lucky to be running an estate with someone so kind. Someone who doesn't understand that you go broke one loan to a tenant or unforgiven gambling debt at a time. Will this turn out to be an instance where Lord G's nobless oblige speaks well of him, or an instance where he's ruining everyone's future with his carelessness? STAY TUNED. For now?

Dignity = £50

And The Ritz Just Keep Coming

Alert Type: A Footman's Ambitions Alert.

Issue: After a couple of days of practicing cooking random stuff, Alfred has his test for that training program at the Ritz.

Complicating Factors: He's only got one day's notice before he has to report. Also he's never been to London before.

Resolution: He goes to London, all on his own, and does passably well, though the chef administering the test doesn't seem to be blown away.

Spoiler: Alfred gets rejected from the program...but it's a very encouraging rejection.

Traditiooooooooon! Tradition!

When Lord G dares to stick up for Drewe at the breakfast table, pretty much everyone thinks he's full of shit.

Evelyn's Come To Flirt With Mary

Don't get too excited: Evelyn can also be an upper-class boy's name. And is, in this case.

And Then She Grew Up And Had Some Mental Problems You May Have Read About (jk)

Before going in for dinner, Tom decides to drop a bombshell: ever since the house party where he felt like such an outsider, he's been thinking that maybe becoming the estate manager at Downton isn't a fresh enough fresh start. He's been talking to some of his relatives in America and thinking that maybe that's the right place for him and little Sybbie to start over with clean slates and so forth. I might have filed this under Thumbs Down if I thought it was actually going to happen, which I don't. For the time being, I'm going to picture Tom and Sybbie looking sad and pale beside a crappy pool like Dawn in the Office Christmas special.

Don't Sleep On A Job Offer

When Alfred's in the running for the Ritz training program, Carson decides to be proactive — which is remarkable because that word doesn't exist yet — and offer Molesley the chance to replace him. Former butler Molesley is horrified by the thought of making his living as a second footman and tells Carson he'll think about it, which sorely offends Carson because it makes Molesley look uppity and proud, neither of which he can really afford given that currently he's mucking out sheep paddocks or whatever the fuck. After pondering the offer, Molesley comes back to Carson to tell him, essentially, that he'll take the job even though it's so far beneath his dignity, whereupon Carson has the pleasure of giving him the bad news: "Oh dear, Mr. Molesley, I'm afraid that Alfred's not leaving now. Yes, a pity you hadn't accepted the job when we last talked. Then I'd've been stuck with you. As it is, you've missed your chance." "As I generally do," Molesley sad-sacks. TOUGH LUCK, SON.