LOLWork: I Can Has Cheezburger Gets A Reality Show
Our Players
Hello, I'm Bravo Executive #1.
Hello, I'm Bravo Executive #2.
Hello, I'm Bravo Executive #3.
Hello, I'm Bravo Executive #4.
The Scene
Team, I'm glad you're all here. We have a tough problem to solve, but I know if we tackle it together, we will prevail and keep Bravo the top cable network of affluencers.
You know it!
We are unstoppable!
Oh, girl, call Downy Unstopables and let's hook something up!
I love Amy Sedaris!
Guys, let's focus up.
Focused! What are we [air quotes] "disrupting" today?
Did you learn that from Start-Ups: Silicon Valley?
Guiltyyyyyyyyyy!
Guys!
Sorry. Hit us, we are ready.
The issue is: we need to find a way to recapture the viewers that we are losing to the internet.
WHAT?
But everyone knows that's impossible!!!
I'm making a run for it! ...THE DOORS ARE LOCKED FROM THE OUTSIDE!!!!!!! WE'RE TRAPPED!!!
You actually have to open that one by pulling, but please don't, this is serious!
But how are we supposed to compete with the internet? We can't just put up people's Facebook feeds in primetime!
Or can we?
See, this is great -- let's talk it through.
Well, people go on Facebook to, what, look at photos--
Check out their friends' links and videos--
Find out whose birthday is today and guess what, it's always someone's birthday, am I right?
So what if our viewers could turn on Bravo at 10 PM on a Monday night and see those things -- photos of cute babies and stuff?
Whose cute babies?
I don't know...stock photo agencies have those, right?
Sure, but--
What if we could make it so that the viewer could customize what they see?
Because they're probably more interested in cute babies that they know.
And maybe they don't care to wait until a particular time to look at it.
I'm going to stop you here: we can't recreate each individual user's Facebook experience on TV.
Dammit!
But that was a good experiment. Don't get discouraged! Let's think about this. What do people like to share on Facebook?
Their plans for the weekend!
Half-baked political opinions!
Their inability to spell!
Videos!
Oh yeah, people really like videos.
See, this is good -- we can show videos!
What if we collected, like, lots of videos that are gross or show people badly hurting themselves, and we got a comedian to make kind of racist jokes between them?
Ho...ly......shit.
That is SUCH A GOOD IDEA!
FUCK!
Let's get out of here!
NO, we're making progress! Other than gross videos or videos of injuries, what do people like to see?
Nip slips!
Terrible renditions of the national anthem!
The Daily Show!
What about, like, cute animals?
Oh yeah!
That sneezing panda, right you guys?
Oh, I haven't seen that one!
I'll send it to you.
How about maybe later?
Geez, make up your mind.
Cute animal videos. Let's go.
Well, I don't really watch that much TV--
No, who does?
But doesn't Animal Planet already have a cute animals show?
Aw, crap, you're right.
But you know, something I have always wondered is, where do these videos come from?
Are you saying...the animals......
I'm not saying the animals shoot them. No.
...
They don't.
Fine.
But a lot of them do come through one site. Those people must see the very best of cute animal videos!
So we should...hire them to make a show for us?
We could. Or!
Or...?
Or...I bet that site is a crazy place to work.
Hmmmmmmm!
What if we made a show about that?
About what?
About what it's like to run I Can Has Cheezburger!
So...your idea for how we should compete with the internet is to pick a popular site and show the people who work there, sitting in their cubes and doing arbitrary tasks that are clearly just ginned up for the cameras? The people is the element that's interesting to you?
Yeah!
Yeah, all right. I bet one of them has some kind of crazy hair that'll read well on camera.