The Army Doesn't Care About Your Kid's Myeloma, Sid

When I briefly worked at a subsidiary of a large multinational corporation, part of my orientation involved taking online courses in avoiding or preventing sexual harassment; workplace safety; and ethical business practices. While the sexual harassment component potentially could have applied to me -- be certain that after I took the course I made sure never to tell my colleague David T. Cole how nicely I thought his dungarees fit him (at least not at the office), the workplace safety and business ethics courses covered material that would have zero application in my work for this company: I was never going to have to be on a ladder for any reason, and I didn't plan to take any kickbacks in a deal I brokered for the sale of any tractors. But I had to take them anyway, which is why I presume that Sid Liao probably had some basic instruction in what constitutes a state secret and why it's not really cool to mess around with shit in the tech area, and maybe he should have paid attention?

And sure, Sid's motives were pretty benign. He didn't intend to sell his research on high-speed photography to the Axis powers; he just wanted to sell the patents and make some money to pay for treatment for his daughter's myeloma (and, good call not counting on the VA's insurance to cover it). But that hardly mattered to Frank last week when Sid unwisely told him about it, so that Frank was then able to trade the info to keep his research group alive -- let's call that Lesson #1.

But things only get worse from there, as the government interrogator carefully goes through the process of trying to break Sid's story with what I think most people would agree is torture: Sid is denied counsel, water, food, and rest.

(The last of these is definitely what convinces me never to mess with government property, by the way. Who's got two thumbs and needs uninterrupted sleep on the reg? This guy.)

Frank has an attack of conscience and tries to undo what he's done by sending Sid to the Pacific theater with directions to a superior officer who'll let him ride out the war as a (comparatively safe) radio operator. And Sid, I guess forgetting that he's kind of brought all this heartache on himself, decides that's not good enough and that maybe what he'd prefer to do is hoodwink an MP, steal his gun, steal a car, and try to go AWOL. And since the soldiers around camp are mostly pretty complacent and lazy, that might have actually worked...except that Iowa happens to be on the gate when Sid is trying to make his great escape and, seeing an opportunity for heroism, stops Sid from reaching for his gun and kills him instead. Who's going to pay for that myeloma treatment now, Sid, you reckless idiot?!