Does Married At First Sight: The First Year's Jamie Really Not Get Why Her Sister Wouldn't Invite JAMIE'S EX To Her Baby Shower?

Will we ever find out what really made Jamie want to do this experiment in the first place?

When we pick back up with the conversation she and Doug were having about The Ex at the end of the last episode, he asks what she had with The Ex that she doesn't with Doug, and she refers to a "level of comfort" and better "communication." When she later talks to Dr. Pepper about him, she tells Dr. Pepper what she misses from that relationship was "stability." So in other words, the attributes she valued in that relationship were the kinds of things that were painstakingly built over a long timeline. Why, then, would she turn around and do something so impulsive -- reckless, even -- as marry someone she had never met?! The obvious answer is "she wanted to be famous and didn't care how," and I'm sure that's part of it! But I wonder if Jamie's bad childhood, and the experience of having been raised by someone who, by her description, was indifferent to her if not actually abusive, made her put (way) too much stock in the idea that experts would carefully take her measure and find her perfect partner for her using "science." If that's the case, Jamie's an even more tragic figure than she already seemed.

Did we all note the passive voice when Jamie says, "I want Doug to feel loved"?

Because that's not the same as if she had said "I want Doug to feel I love him." I mean, I want Doug to feel loved too, I guess, as an abstract concept; he's a human being. That doesn't mean I want the job, and it increasingly seems like Jamie doesn't want it either.

How fake is Jason's anguish over his absent father?

Jason is in his twenties and, from what we have heard, has never known his father. I know I already said this last week, but based on my own experience and those of people I know who didn't have relationships with their biological parents -- which I know is not a scientific sample, but I'm just saying -- you can't miss what you don't have. I really refuse to believe that Jason would look out on the crowd at his wedding or his graduation from Fire Academy and ache for someone he's never known. The only way Jason's whole storyline this season with regard to his biological father makes sense to me, other than that it's being goosed or outright manufactured by producers, is if he still hasn't really processed his feelings about the passing of his mother -- the woman who actually did raise him, who wasn't at his wedding or his graduation, and whom he's never going to be able to connect with again -- and he's turning that real heartbreak into this other thing that might eventually turn into a "moment" for him on the show.

How much has Jamie already been talking about The Ex?

It was clear in the last episode when Jamie and Doug were talking about him that The Ex had come up as a topic of conversation for them before -- which it naturally would, as in any new relationship, when each half describes his or her past. But when Doug goes out to lunch with his brother Matt and mentions that Jamie's having conflicted feelings about The Ex, Matt immediately response, "That old dude?" First of all: ha! Second: has Jamie been talking about him, like, at Hehner family gatherings? Because I wouldn't put it past her! In this very episode, she makes it clear that while the rest of us heard Doug tell her, basically, if she doesn't love Doug she should release him from her clutches and go be with her ex, what she heard was, "Oh, you have this ex, and I see that you have a past, and maybe feelings well up, but I know he's so important to you and I won't take him away from you." So I can imagine a situation where the famously un-self-aware Jamie would be at Thanksgiving chatting to one of Doug's siblings about "this amazing ex" and what good pals they are while the sibling was like "o_O."

Speaking of Jamie's lack of self-awareness: does she REALLY not get why her sister wouldn't invite The Ex to her BABY SHOWER?

Four years is, of course, a long time for a couple to be together, and if Jamie and The Ex really were that close, of course Jamie's siblings would have spent time with him at family events during that time. But then, like, he and Jamie broke up, and the only one who seems not to understand that means he's not going to be coming around that much anymore is Jamie. As Jamie and Leah write out invitations to Leah's imminent baby shower, Jamie "casually" asks whether Leah's planning to invite The Ex. It seems like Jamie has cooked up this plan because it seems to her to be a great idea for Doug and The Ex to meet at a busy event where no one's going to want to make shit awkward. (Secondarily, it seems like Jamie wants to invite The Ex to the shower so she can hang out with him and ditch Doug -- to wit: "It's kind of nice if it's a big group thing, 'cause then it's like, we don't have to sit there and talk to each other.") Leah, A NORMAL HUMAN WHO HAS EMPATHY FOR OTHER HUMANS, suggests that inviting The Ex to an event with Jamie and her current husband Doug will be uncomfortable for everyone, but Jamie disagrees: "I don't think that Doug would really care." BASED ON WHAT?! Even if one were to be very generous -- to a fault -- and accept Jamie's interpretation of Doug's telling her "If that's something that's going to continue to hold you up, I encourage you to go" as "I know he's so important to you and I won't take him away from you," that doesn't mean that Doug wants to meet The Ex. And if Leah says yes, what is Jamie's endgame? For The Ex and The Hehners to be friends and hang out? Or for Doug to see her with The Ex, realize the two of them are better together, and graciously step aside to let them resume their great love? Whichever one of those it is, it should not occur...I mean, it shouldn't occur at all. But it definitely shouldn't ruin Leah's baby shower. Jamie is on her fourth reality show; that should sate her vampiric yearning for attention such that she doesn't also try to steal focus with her drama at other people's parties.

When Dr. Pepper tells Jamie to "put [The Ex] away," is she actually going to do it?

I haven't had much use for Dr. Pepper in my life thus far, but in the last episode and this one she's really stepped up as the audience surrogate and laid some Real Talk on Jamie that she needed to hear. This week, the moment comes when Jamie has her sit-down with Dr. Pepper and goes into it practically preening over the congratulations she's expecting to be showered upon her for being so honest with Doug about her ambivalence with regard to The Ex. Instead, she gets showered with some ice-cold reality from Dr. Pepper, who tells us, "I would call it indulgent to overshare," and tells Jamie in no uncertain terms that she needs to quit acting like The Ex is an option for her as long as she's married to Doug. "I'm not going to be a better person by hiding it from [Doug]," Jamie attempts. To no avail! "Put him away" is Dr. Pepper's advice, and she further prescribes Jamie to work on her physical intimacy with Doug. Given how Jamie willfully misinterpreted "I encourage you to go" this week, I look forward to seeing what spin Jamie puts on Dr. Pepper's extremely clear and unvarnished advice on this one when we meet back up with Jamie next week and she and The Ex are buying a time-share together or something.

Jamie refers to herself as "Aunt Gorgeous"?!

I know that's her nieces' and nephews' gross nickname for her. That doesn't mean that (a) she shouldn't have shut it down a long time ago or (b) she should use it, ABOUT HERSELF, when they are not present. Shut up, Jamie.

Can we not, with the MAFS alumnae pole-dancing sesh?

I get that Monet is trying to stay relevant and/or start establishing the Married At First Sight equivalent of Bachelor Nation by inserting herself into TFY doings (and also that the purpose of the pole-dancing class scene was so that, afterward, she could obliquely backdoor the MAFS spinoff #BlackLove by referring to this other group of friends with whom she's trying to "figure this dating life out as a team"). But that was tiresome to watch...

...except for the way it set up the closing scene with Jamie and Doug. First, Jamie asks how Doug's day was. When he tells her, "It was a very stressful day, actually," she apparently doesn't ask why, instead changing the subject to her, and to Dr. Pepper's latest advice about how to make life with Jamie less hellish for Doug. To this end, she tells him she took a pole-dancing class, AND THEN WE ARE FORCED TO WATCH THE ENTIRE ROUTINE SHE LEARNED. Doug is appreciative (though for once he doesn't make any direct reference to his boner), and tries to reciprocate with his own dance for her. Unwisely, he starts it by quickly turning the light on and off a bunch. "Doug, you're ruining the sexiness!" Jamie yelps. GREAT START ON DR. PEPPER'S PRESCRIPTION, JAMIE.