Bravermans On The Brink Of Bereavement?

Eating Their Lunch(eonette)

Alert Type: Robbery Alert.

Issue: Adam and Crosby learn that the alarm went off at The Luncheonette: apparently cops are there and it looks pretty bad.

Complicating Factors: Neither Adam nor Crosby can go deal with that right now because they're kind of tied up at the hospital waiting to find out if their dad is going to die.

Resolution: When they find out Zeek has been stabilized (of which more later), Crosby and Adam (at Camille's suggestion) go to The Luncheonette to assess the situation, and it is, indeed, pretty bad: a bunch of albums and what seems to be all the equipment has been cleaned out.

However, when Adam volunteers to talk to their insurance company, he gets a pleasant surprise: the settlement they're being offered is, somehow, the first generous settlement an insurance company's ever made. Adam reports to Crosby that it's enough for them to pay off all their outstanding debts and have enough left over not just to put some cash in their own pockets, but to give Amber some severance. Adam makes it pretty clear that's what he wants to do, and Crosby seems like he agrees.

Spoiler: Crosby doesn't actually agree.

No Thanks, Hank

Situation: Hank finally notices that Sarah slipped out of bed and out of the apartment and calls her to find out, whereupon she informs him of her father's medical emergency.

What makes it awkward? Hank has apparently read in a book that the appropriate thing for him to do is to join her at the hospital and support her, but when he offers to do that, she's like, ummmmmm, that's okay!

How is order restored? When Hank insists upon being a partner to Sarah despite her demurral, she fobs him off by telling him that Drew's car won't start, so maybe Hank could go pick him up and bring him down. Hank:

Rating This Uber Driver One Star For Excessive Chattiness

Hank has evidently read in another book that when you pick up your girlfriend's son to drive him to the hospital for a vigil on behalf of his maybe-dying grandfather, you're supposed to try to "relate" to him. Hank should throw that book in the garbage!

Mid-Episode Facts About Zeek's Condition As Told By The Night Doctor On Duty, None Of Which Is Especially Funny

• Zeek's stabilized.
• He did have a heart attack.
• His irregular heartbeat's been addressed.
• "He's not out of the woods yet."
• He's being transferred to the ICU
• Dr. Gordon, Zeek's primary physician, will assess Zeek when he gets to the ICU and come up with a plan.

Here We Go Again, On Our Own

The Scene: Julia and Joel are on their way in to see Zeek when a nurse tells her it's "family members only."

The Symbol: Julia's response: "He's my husband."

The Meaning: Despite how she tried to play it off to Sarah and Amber earlier, her assignation with Joel probably wasn't actually just a one-time thing.

Camille is still in the room with Zeek when Joel and Julia enter, but as Julia greets Zeek, he immediately starts crashing and they get hustled out!

Camille watches, distraught, as the paddles come out!

Zap!

With Camille trailing, Zeek is rushed through the halls!

Julia has to come back out to the waiting room and tell her siblings what just happened, but she's basically no help, so Joel has to take over and explain that they took Zeek to the cath lab, "but they're on top of it." THANK GOD JOEL WAS HERE!

Seriously: Hanks For Nothing

Situation: Drew is racked with guilt about the fact that his last interaction with Zeek was when Zeek scolded him for having narced about his travel plans to Camille.

What makes it awkward? The only person who seems to have noticed Drew is upset is Hank, the last person Drew wants to talk to. "He's been there for me the whole time," Drew chokes, "way more than my dad, way more than any of these losers that my mom brings around." Yikes!

How is order restored? Hank doesn't take offense at Drew's dismissal of him as one of the many pieces of human garbage Sarah's dated, and sits down, sensibly telling Drew that even though he can't say he knows Zeek will be okay, he can say, as a father, that Zeek's definitely not thinking about Drew's part in Travelgate: "We don't hold on to any of that stuff." Aw. And this advice even seems natural and unforced! Who knew?

Groove Evidence Of Years Of Deterioration Is In The Heart

Who called the meeting? Dr. Gordon.

What's it about? He's interrupted the kids' fond reminiscences of Zeek's greatest parenting hits (like the time Crosby thought he'd successfully snuck out and evaded detection, only to slip back into his bed and find Zeek in it waiting for him) to give that assessment of Zeek's current condition and prognosis.

How'd it go? As regards Zeek's prospects: outlook not so good. Stents have been successfully inserted, but Zeek's heart is still not as strong as it needs to be. His options are:

1. Fix the valve with another surgery...except Zeek's heart isn't as strong as it used to be, so opening him up again could be dangerous.
2. Do nothing...but then Zeek might have another heart attack, or a stroke, or an aneurysm.
3. "Take some time. Rest up. Talk to the family. I'm sure you have lots of questions, and I promise you, we'll talk about all of them."

Wow, those all suck! So much for France, Zeek.

Joels And Johns

Hank has resumed feeling extraneous, and focused his sense of inadequacy on comparing himself to Joel. Fortunately, Drew has come to make peace.

"Will You Tolerate Me As Long As We Both Shall Live?"

Situation: Watching Joel effortlessly take charge at the hospital has made Hank envious, but also given him something specific to aim for as a goal. And with that in mind, Hank finds Sarah in the ambulance bay to make a very important statement: "We should get married."

What makes it awkward? Sarah's answer: "Ohhhhhhhh, Hank."

How is order restored? Hank explains himself a little more: "I love you, and I want to marry you....I don't want to be half-in: not now, and not ever." EVEN HANK can tell that Sarah is not blown off her feet by this "proposal," though, so he gives her an out by telling her she doesn't have to answer right now, and she's like, thank god, but inside, and trudges back inside with a promise that they'll talk about it later. Adding to the lingering awkwardness, though, is the fact that Hank brags to a stranger coming out that he just proposed, not realizing that when she congratulates him and he clarifies that he and his intended are going to talk about it, that's not such a great way for the conversation to have ended?

In the aftermath of Dr. Gordon's pessimistic assessment, Camille sits with Zeek, who's sorry he scared her the way he did, and who wishes they could go back a few years, just the two of them, and have some fun together. (While you're at it, go back even further and have LOTS of fun by skipping having kids -- especially Adam.) He's not so sure about having an operation, and Camille, recognizing that they don't have to decide anything right now, just brushes it off, saying they'll think about it, talk to the kids, the usual. But Zeek doesn't want the kids involved: "We'll make the decision, you and me." Her voice breaking, Camille agrees. Sorry, Adam, you won't get to boss your way through this one!

Amber and Drew have a nice, quiet moment with Zeek that sure feels final.

Joel and Hank have a beer, noting that it's "big" that Sarah didn't turn down Hank's "proposal." Further proof that Joel is the perfect man: telling Hank that obvious lie.

Elsewhere in the bar, Crosby and Adam blah blah about the dream cars they hope to be driving years from now, when they look back on this awful day and laugh, and then Crosby's like, oh, by the way, I don't want to cash out of The Luncheonette -- that's cool, right? Adam:

Seems cool.

"It's Also Your Special Day, Now! You're Welcome!"

What's the occasion? Since Zeek has been graceless enough to have a heart attack on the day Amber's lady relatives had scheduled her baby shower, they've relocated it to the hospital cafeteria.

What are the refreshments? All the stuff they had originally ordered for the cancelled shower, and I don't know about this "Pierre's" but I wouldn't endorse this menu given the WEIRD LUMP it left in my throat!

Whose embarrassing public scene will everyone be talking about tomorrow? The Braverman ladies hand Amber a book in which they've each written a page of advice and left the rest blank for Amber to fill in herself, but preview what they wrote -- to wit, "Life is short I know how impossibly fast it goes by" (Camille) and "No matter what, I will always have your back" (Sarah). So the embarrassing scene everyone will be talking about is HOW MUCH THIS SCENE MADE YOU CRY. YES IT DID.