Teen Mom 3 Ends Its Season-Long Lesson In How Not To Co-Parent

There's so much I could say about the first season of Teen Mom 3. I could express my dismay that more emphasis wasn't put on the fact that these girls' decision to become mothers before they were even kind of finished with the lowest levels of education they will need has crippled their ability to provide for their children's future. I could complain that the true hero of this season has been Briana's sister Brittany, who was pregnant when Briana was, but decided to terminate her pregnancy and as a direct consequence is having a wonderful life as a carefree college student, going out to bars and on trips, and that maybe if MTV used more of its teen-pregnancy resources to remind accidentally pregnant teen viewers that if they can just address the matter head-on as soon as they know they're pregnant and figure out how to take advantage of the safe, legal abortion resources available to them (which I know are forever shrinking in this country, but still — and maybe MTV could direct some of its activism toward raising awareness of that issue), they could also have great, unruined lives like Brittany's.

I could complain about the way that the girls' regarding motherhood as an inevitability of their pregnancies apparently hasn't affected the guys who got them pregnant at all, and how practically nothing in popular culture more clearly demonstrates, week after week, why the feminist project still isn't over than the way all the teen fathers on this show have zero compunctions about failing to support their children — and, from what we can see, face zero repercussions for it. I could call out the way that MTV seemingly endorses the teen moms' attitudes when they say they don't want to "go after" their children's fathers for child support, because we know the reason they don't is that they don't want to risk their romantic relationships with them — even if they're not together anymore, because they all still have notions of getting together with their kids' dads forever and forming happy families with them. I could especially get good and mad about the fact that Joey — who I am not qualified to say is abusive toward Katie in a legal sense, but who sure isn't very nice to her — actually somehow manages to be the best father on the show just by evincing the least amount of interest in his child, when the other three don't even seem to care if they see their kids at all.

I could bemoan Matt's specific failure to remain sober for any reason, least of all the daughter he seems barely to remember even exists. I could rage at the idea that delivering a single package of diapers during the whole first year of his daughter's life suggests that Devoin is capable of being a meaningful presence in her life, as Briana seems to believe. I could ask what makes Mackenzie think Josh has any kind of capacity for being in a loving relationship with her or anyone else when his apparent ability to express himself or consider the feelings of others is nil. I could weep for the way all three of the teen moms who spent any amount of screen time partnered with their children's fathers seemed to think that going into counselling with them might be the panacea that saves their relationships, when it's clear to anyone watching that Josh, Matt, and Joey are unable to participate equally in therapy, and definitely unwilling to try.

I could say any of that. Or I could just go back to the scene in which Briana proudly tells her mother Roxanne and her aunt Christina about the diapers Devoin brought over, as though this represents a watershed moment in their relationship, and in his relationship with their daughter, Nova, as opposed to literally the least he could have been doing and SHOULD HAVE BEEN DOING for the past year of Nova's life. And thank God, someone in the scene actually says what I would have if I'd been there.

I really hope that Briana heard this — heard and believed that she and Nova deserve better from Devoin or from any other man that would try to be in their lives, and that Briana won't get it unless she demands it. I hope Mackenzie heard it and realized that the right guy for her and Gannon won't be the one who picks a fight on their way to their first therapy session and tries to kick her out of his truck onto the roadside, along with their child and who responds to her sobbing that she just wants him to love her by resisting her desperate hug. I hope Katie heard and and realized that she's better off on her own than begging for scraps from a reluctant, unworthy assbag like Joey. I feel pretty confident that Alex heard it, but then, Matt helped her by forcing the issue with his addiction.

I know a lot of time has passed between the time this season was taped and when it was broadcast, and I hope every bit of life experience these girls have had in that time has helped them grow up and away from the guys who happened to be the ones who got them pregnant but who otherwise shouldn't have any place in their lives whatsoever. And I really, really hope that any girls watching who may find themselves pregnant this year will learn from their examples what not to do...starting with giving birth in high school.