Have Yourself A Pantsless Little Christmas

As a childless person who hasn't lived in the same city as any of my relatives in close to a decade, I rarely have to do things I don't want to. I'm the kind of person who sees ladymag coverlines like "10 Guilt-Free Strategies For Saying No" and think not "I have to find out what those are" and "I don't get how this is a lesson people need to learn." Which is why, as much as I like The Middle, it's hard for me to like the character of Frankie: though she's a constant fuckup in the Liz Lemon/"Old" Christine Campbell mold, she's also plagued with self-recrimination for all the ways in which she falls short of her image of what a good mother and wife is supposed to do. Which is why this week's episode was such a refreshing change: finally, Frankie realizes that pants are for chumps.

It's Christmas, and the Hecks are doing their holiday prep with the same attitude they bring to every task: half-assed and resentful.

When the artificial tree they've bought is missing a top, Frankie seems to take it as a sign that Christmas -- in general -- is not worth the effort. Mike tells her she's just "in a funk," but to me it looks less like a funk than an epiphany. The Heck kids are all too old for Santa by now (yes, even Sue); it doesn't seem like anyone's coming over to celebrate with the family. If Frankie wants to take a year off from all the Christmas crap, it's hard to blame her, particularly when taking the pressure off herself instantly improves her mood, like to unprecedented levels of happiness for the series.

As Frankie explains to the confused kids, they'll still get presents; she's just not going to get "sucked in" to all the surrounding Christmas fooferaw: "Right now, for me, it's just more about laying around, watching TV, eating my mom's fudge, and actually having fun at Christmas for once." She's especially annoyed that Axl doesn't appreciate her new mindset given that he spends more time at home half-clad than in any other state, and takes off her pants in order to relax all the way. The kids are aghast, BECAUSE THEY'RE DUMB. They don't realize what Frankie has: laying around, watching TV, and eating fudge, with your pants off IS THE LIFE GOAL WE SHOULD ALL BE STRIVING FOR. I spend every minute of most weeks' Monday to Friday arranging my life so that the second I clock out on Friday, I have NOTHING TO DO for the next forty-eight hours -- or, at least, nothing that requires me to put on a bra. IT'S CALLED HAPPINESS.

Eventually, Mike reminds Frankie -- without guilt or expectation -- that he doesn't blame her for giving up on the decorations and such since he never really celebrated Christmas at all until he met her, and she realizes that she does have an obligation to him, if not to anyone else, to get it up for the holiday.

But for those few days when Frankie was truly living her best life, pantsless on the couch in front of dumb TV and with snacks within a non-stretched arm's reach...I enjoyed having her join me in the sisterhood of unapologetic sloth.