Dome Look Back In Anger

Dome Angry! Dome Smash Smoosh!

Open on a glowing half-sphere, just like the Dome when we left it except it's totally not the Dome, it's just a lightbulb that some dude we've never seen before is testing! Stephen King, you misdirecting rascal! The dude fidgets and pulls out a liquor bottle, but before he can take a pull, he sees something weird happening in the Dome under which he's now lived for quite some time and runs outside his rustic cabin to stare at the pulsing of the super-sun or whatever!

In the town square, as Big Jim berates him, Junior dithers anxiously about doing the completely normal, everyday task of sending a shady ex-military type to his death via public hanging! COME ON JUNIOR WHAT IS THE BIG DEAL ALREADY!

Having just tossed the Dome egg into Dome Lake or whatever the fuck, Julia steers her boat to shore, only to hear a commotion; she turns to see a girl drowning and leaps right in to save her even though the lake is not that big and it seems kind of strange that this is the first Julia would have noticed of her, I mean where did she fucking come from?!

The three annoying kids happen to be standing near a church when all of a sudden the Dome turns magnetic and sucks a gigantic bell right out of the steeple! The steeple collapses and almost kills them! But they narrowly escape! Uh...phew?

Back in the town square, this moaning noise from the Dome (I mean, one presumes) causes a bunch of people to pass out! Barbie tries to convince Big Jim to let him go on the basis of "shit going down," basically! Junior finally cracks and tells Big Jim he can't hang Barbie: "I think the Dome's trying to tell us something!" The Dome's powers of communication are at best a blunt instrument, in my opinion! Anyway, Junior wants to go to the Dome because it might "have answers"! "The Dome doesn't HAVE answers!" growls Big Jim! But Junior disagrees! Big Jim is about to pull the lever and drop Barbie himself, but suddenly Linda is there drawing her weapon on Big Jim because, conveniently, this first wave of sick-making Domesounds hasn't incapacitated anyone in the opening-credits cast! "We need to take a trip to the Dome," she says! You might as well, IT IS NOT A LONG TRIP FROM ANY GIVEN POINT IN CHESTER'S MILL!

Julia drags Drownsie out of the water and is performing CPR when all of a sudden Drunky McCabin appears! No one recognizes anyone else even though they've all been stuck inside this Dome for several days if not weeks but none of them seems bothered by this so NEVER MIND I GUESS! Drunky gets Drownsie to cough up water! Problem solved forever!

Sheriff Linda Esquivel, 1984-2013 (???)

Linda, despite losing your firefighter boyfriend or husband or whatever on the other side of this otherworldly Dome, you were valiant in your mostly futile attempts to keep the citizens of Chester's Mill safe from both inexplicable, probably alien-related mayhem and the sub-Dome machinations of the nefarious Big Jim Rennie. With no regard for your own safety and managing not to burst out laughing when the Dome's new magnetic pull dragged Barbie to itself by his cuffs which is frankly more than I can say of myself, you freed him from his confinement with little regard for your own safety, and then apparently froze with terror as an SUV got sucked toward you and failed to use the several seconds you clearly had to get out of the way, instead getting SUV-smooshed to death. You're singing with the angels now, and I hope they're not as annoyed by your scratchy voice as I have been.

The "E" Stands For "Excellent At Hiding In A Comparatively Small Area And With No Apparent Need For Supplies"

Rennie vs. Rennie

After a freed Barbie joins Junior in throwing around recriminations about Linda's death and then takes off to find Julia, Big Jim tries to return to his default mode of bossing Junior around, but Junior's not having it anymore. Since he heard Barbie say it, he now believes that Big Jim, not Barbie, killed Dodee, which Big Jim shrugs off as falling under the rubric of "Someone has to make the hard choices!" He sneers that Junior's not prepared to do that, but Junior's like, "Linda just did! Who's next, Dad?! Maybe it's you." ...what? Does he mean Big Jim will be the next to be as brave as Linda was? Or the next to be dumb/slow enough to get crushed between the Dome and a light truck?

Winner: For now, it's a draw, though Junior the murdering kidnapper takes the moral victory somehow.

Now Where The Fuck Did You Come From, Lady?

Metal Shit That Flies Everywhere And Almost Kills People Thanks To The Dome Being A Giant Magnet Now

• mailboxes
• some kind of farm equipment
• pots
• skillets
• shitload of knives
• baker's rack
• radiator
• nails that have been hammered into the wall (one of which impales Joe's hand and then gets sucked straight through it but don't worry he's totally fine a scene later)
• a bunch of fixtures in Big Jim's bomb shelter, including the handgun he picks out from his arsenal, and the door, which slams on him just as he's trying to get out
• deck furniture
• oven
• all the nails and, I guess, pipe from the McAllister house, which basically implodes

Bring Out Your Specific Dead!

Situation: Big Jim gets a visit from Dodee.

What Makes It Awkward? He killed her. And, not that it would probably make much difference if he could get away from her, but he can't, because a bunch of metal shit got dropped on top of the bomb shelter door, so he's trapped.

How is order restored? After letting Dodee do creepy shit like stick her finger in her wound and pull it out all bloody and also tell him portentously that he should have listened to Junior, Big Jim rigs up some kind of contraption and blasts his way out of the bomb shelter. That may only resolve the situation temporarily, though.

Pocketknives!

Are you trapped under a gigantic dome that is periodically emitting crazy groans you can't explain? Do you need to run from some part of its contained area you apparently never knew about before a couple of hours ago into town? Are you unsure of what you'll find when you get there? Why not take a knife? Who knows, maybe those noises will stop if you stab them!

The Girl With The Pearl Aspirated In Her Throat From When She Was Drowning

Alert Type: Outsider Art Alert.

Issue: Sam apparently finds Drownsie strangely familiar.

Mitigating Circumstances: ...he's drunk? Also, some pretty wack shit has been happening under this Dome lately.

Resolution: He pulls out a scrapbook belonging to a Pauline Verdreaux and finds a sketch that looks just like Drownsie.

Spoiler: You've seen art like this before, and you're going to see more of it.

Domes Make Strange Domefellows

Who called the meeting? Junior, in the sense that he wanders into the diner while Angie's there looking for the gun under the counter.

What's it about? She is planning to stop the crazy groans by doing what she thinks the Dome wants and killing Big Jim.

How'd it go? Junior's like, Totally kill my dad, I will even get you a gun from the cop shop, and Angie's like, Word. So: pretty efficiently.

You Lazy Dicks

Rebecca's magnet plan sure came together quickly! Barbie's like, Are you really sure this is going to work? and she is suuuuuuuper-defensive about it! Look, bitch, Barbie didn't tell you to give up on your MSc and become a teacher so why don't you lose the attitude?!

Back at the school -- which Rebecca had said was the safest spot because it's at the exact centre of the Dome -- Norrie anxiously watches a passed-out Carolyn...and then the Dome groans again and Norrie passes out herself!

Junior and Angie also collapse!

And back at the magnet that isn't doing shit, everyone passes out except Barbie! IF JULIA IS THE MONARCH OF CHESTER'S MILL THEN BARBIE IS THE COCKROACH!

The Loins That Junior Sprang From

The Self-Assassination Of Big Jim Rennie Prevented By The Buttinsky Julia Shumway

Alert Type: Noble Suicide Alert.

Issue: When Big Jim sees Junior passed out, he decides there must be something to all that stuff Dodee was trying to tell him -- particularly after Dead Linda also appears to him and starts telling him all about the virtue of sacrifice.

Mitigating Circumstances: Barbie and Julia -- who've just had their big reunion at the useless magnet and are trying to figure out what they're supposed to do before the next Dome groan takes them out, too -- roll up at the gallows just as Big Jim decides he's going to hang himself because he's pretty sure it's what the Dome wants him to do.

Resolution: Julia initially says she'll pull the lever, but then changes her mind, telling Big Jim, "I can't do what you do." He calls her a coward and then kicks in the trapdoor himself, whereupon she pulls out Sam's good old pocketknife and cuts him down almost immediately, so either she's super-strong, the rope is weak as hell, or Sam sharpened that knife so that he'd be able to use it to slice open champagne bottles. Anyway, this causes the Dome fog to clear, and Julia confidently declares, "The Dome doesn't want us to kill you. He wants us to end the killing." WHAT "HE"?! Everyone gets up, all the metal stuff falls off the Dome...and Drownsie uncovers Linda and coos, "Sorry," closing her eyes.

Spoiler: Let's be real: angry Dome or not, the town would almost certainly be better off if Big Jim were dead.

As townsfolk joyously dismantle the gallows, the dude they were totally about to hang on it muses, "It's hard to believe a couple of hours ago they were all out cold." "A few hours before that, they were out for your blood," Julia replies. DON'T CALL ATTENTION TO THESE MANIC MOOD SWINGS, SHOW. Barbie runs into Rebecca and introduces her to Julia because of course they've never met, why would they? Rebecca is cocky about her magnet having worked, and when Julia posits that it was actually "something bigger," Rebecca's like

Ladies, either of your explanations is equally likely or unlikely in the midst of all this bullshit so maybe try being a little more tolerant of each other when you're TRAPPED IN A DOME.

Oh my god, Stan Lee!!!

Phil is furious with Big Jim for letting Barbie go free because unlike Junior he wasn't there to have the experience of hearing Barbie proclaim his innocence and thus believe it unconditionally! Big Jim pacifies him with a deputy's star! Way to stand on your principles, Phil!

Big Jim heard about the McAllister house blowing down and offers to let everyone come live with him! The kids are snotty about it, but Carolyn accepts on the grounds of "keep your friends close, keep your enemies etc"!

Angie pours coffee for Big Jim and tells him he's lucky she was passed out because she would have killed him in a hot second! Junior stands and watches watchfully while Big Jim backs down and leaves! Angie checks to see if Junior still has her back! Sure, why wouldn't he, he totally had it (literally) when he imprisoned her in his bomb shelter! And then Sam enters! Hey, that's Junior's uncle! And he's looking for Drownsie! Angie directs him to where she saw Drownsie last! Sam runs into Barbie and Julia outside. Barbie is territorial with Julia! Sam tells Julia he lost Drownsie! "Well, she couldn't have gone far," Julia sighs. NO, SHE CERTAINLY COULDN'T, IN THAT SHE LIKE THE REST OF YOU IS TRAPPED IN A DOME!

Junior exposits that Sam hasn't been seen since "Mom's funeral"! He is her brother, or was, when she was alive, which she no longer is! Big Jim is sorry he didn't believe Junior's Dome theories! Junior tries to tell him about meeting up with Mom, and will not accept that it was just a dream! Also he wants to be called "James" now! NO!

Pauline/Big Mom wakes up in a city to a bad painting of Junior! She sets it aside and starts adding red to a painting of what appears to be the door on Big Jim's bomb shelter! "The world remains fascinated by the Dome, and the people still trapped inside," says a news report. OH, WORD? THE REST OF THE WORLD IS STILL INTERESTED IN HOW THIS FUCKING DOME CAME OUT OF GODDAMN NOWHERE AND TRAPPED A WHOLE TOWN? MAYBE THE REST OF THE WORLD COULD SHOW IT BY TRYING TO GET THEM THE FUCK OUT?!!??!?!??!?

Angie takes the garbage generated by her diner traffic where she was serving people food of unknown provenance which they were paying for with meaningless currency out to a dumpster where it will be collected by ?? and removed to ???? when she spots Drownsie! She calls out to her, but Drownsie ignores her, and Angie trails her to the school! She sees Drownsie peering into a locker, and then Drownsie leaves and Angie looks in it! And whatever it is makes her look like this!

AND THEN SOMEONE COMES AT HER WITH AN AXE!!!!!