Screens: FXX
Sam Gives Gretchen A Wake-Up Call In You're The Worst's Season 2 Premiere
It's a scene so quotable, 'That Quote' is actually two quotes!
Life is rough for Gretchen Cutler. She's moved in with her exclusive boyfriend, Jimmy; they're having lots of drug-fueled, adventurous sex; and she's the envy of her best friend (and probably her best friend's bitter sister, not that she'd admit it). If that doesn't sound like Gretchen's life is rough, that's probably because I didn't mention the toll it's taking on her: she's covered in bruises, she woke up with a nosebleed, and it probably won't be that long before someone comes looking for that DVD rental box she and Jimmy boosted. Also, she missed a lunch with her most important client. And he's pissed.
When Sam, Honey Nutz, and Shitstain come looking for Gretchen, she's kind of already ruined their day. ("Just three dudes sitting alone at Chin Chin like weirdos." - Honey Nutz.) But coming into Gretchen's office and seeing that she blew off their lunch because she's asleep is more than any reasonable person should be expected to take, which is why Sam doesn't, leaning in nice and close and sing-songing her nickname -- "Biiiii-iiiiiiitch! BIIIII-iiiiiIIIIIITCH!" -- before escalating his urgency.
Once Gretchen realizes what's happening, and that Sam et al. haven't actually shown up at her house, she makes the tactical error of making excuses for herself, or trying to -- "I haven't been sleeping much" -- setting Sam up for his first extremely quotable quote of the episode.
Disgusted that Gretchen has demonstrated an inability to "act like a human person and pick up [her] goddamn phone when [he] call[s] [her] stank ass," Sam has a solution: a Yo Mobile burner to use as her "God phone," for when God wants to talk to her, or she wants to talk to God. Gretchen snickers that those phones are sold at her dispensary and that, after all, she has a work phone. But Sam's patience has run out.
And with that, Sam consigns Gretchen to the category of "hookers and drug addicts and irresponsible garbage people," which from what we've seen in the premiere probably is where Gretchen belongs. If she can't account for how she got all those scrapes on her arms and legs, she's probably worse off than a hooker, in fact.
Getting a talking-to from a respected artist who owns a Craftsman house should move Gretchen to straighten her life out.
Well, he tried.